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How to help your child manage the stress of divorce

by | Jul 2, 2021 | Child Custody & Support

Divorce can be very stressful for children in North Carolina especially if they feel caught in the middle between two warring parents. Moreover, they may identify with parents who claim the other acted awfully or unfairly. This could lead to trouble at home or at school and can damage the child’s self-esteem. The following are some ways you can help your child manage the stress of divorce.

Talk to your child about what will change and what will not

Oftentimes the first discussion you and your ex will have when breaking the news of divorce to their child is what will change post-divorce. Parents may talk about who the child will live with, when the child will see the other parent and whether the child will have to move away. While these are important points to address just as important is reassuring your child about what will not change post-divorce. Make sure your child knows that both you and your ex love them unconditionally. In addition, make sure your child understands that they are not at fault for the divorce. Also, keep the discussion of divorce ongoing. As the child processes the divorce, they may have further questions or concerns. Sometimes it is beneficial for a child to see a therapist to help work through the process of adjusting to their parents’ divorce.

Serve as a good role model

Children are resilient and can adapt to the changes divorce brings over time. They may feel relieved that the constant conflict will be resolved through divorce. Children can benefit from parents who serve as good role models post-divorce. For example, keeping things pleasant at pick-ups and drop-off or attending important events in the child’s life together can help their child adjust to life post-divorce. Parents should avoid talking negatively about one another in their child’s presence and should encourage the child to have a relationship with both them and their ex.

Learn more about divorce and child custody in North Carolina

Most parents in North Carolina want to make the divorce process as stress-free for their child as they can. Children, just like adults, need to process the divorce in a positive and productive manner so they can move forward into the “new normal” post-divorce. This post is for educational purposes only and does not contain legal advice. Our firm’s webpage on child custody may be of interest to parents going through the divorce process.